HIATUS

OVERHEARD IN A BAR: "Saddam shipped the WMD to Syria. Give me another double shot."

TWENTY-YEARS-FROM-NOW NEWS: Minneapolis joins several other major cities in adding aspirin to the municipal drinking water. "This will lead to a reduction in heart attacks," according to an AMA spokesperson. The city already adds sodium fluoride to the water in its program to preserve perfect teeth.

QUOTEWORTHY: "Free trade is destructive. That's why I'm for it." - Karl Marx


World Report will be back on September 7, 2006.

LOOK, IN THE SKY. IT'S JESSE JACKSON.

Here he comes again. Reverend Jesse Jackson has offered to bring the two sides to an agreement on the release of prisoners in the Lebanon affair. The war began when the Hezbollah kidnapped two Israeli soldiers across the border in Israel. At least hundreds of Lebanese men have been held in Israeli prisons for months and years. Both sides should welcome the effort.

Jackson has contacted the ambassadors of both nations and received favorable reactions. He insists he can be an effective go between and bring freedom to captives. Who would bet against him? He has an impressive record of accomplishment in this realm. He achieved freedom for hundreds of captives, including Americans, in Syria, Iraq, Yugoslavia, Cuba, etc.

Predictably, the Bush administration spokesman, Tony Fox Snow, is throwing cold water on the reverend. He insists that this is a government matter to be handled by officials. We've heard that before. Would Tony dare suggest that Bush could achieve this noble goal?

If the Israelis and Hezbollah/Lebanese will agree to meeting with Jesse Jackson, he'll set men free again.

It's a tough job. Jesse has to do it.

A NATION DIVIDED

Even if you don't know much about history, you know that America is a house divided against itself. You're either with us or against us. War is the great issue causing people to choose sides. People supporting these wars are called patriots, the others are anti-Americans.

Conservatives good; liberals bad. Hate is fine; tolerance is disgusting. Fear helps the cause, lack of fear shows ignorance. Christian nation for sure; diversity never. Media lies; presidents tell the truth. Authority is always right; thinking and challenging is wrong (left.)

We might as well break into two nations - war mongers on the east of the Mississippi River and appeasers on the west side. I know what you're thinking: "They'll go to war with each other."
Maybe, but at least we'd avoid a civil war. Those are ugly.

Meanwhile, Islamic fascists have to be eradicated. I mean, they strap bombs on their kids and send them to the store. They want to kill us for our freedom, and don't forget the 72 virgins.

Now go take on the day.

IT'S ALL SO SIMPLE

*The judge in the case of 24 London terrorists accused of plotting to blow up 10 airliners enroute to the USA is allowing another week for prosecutors to gather evidence. A couple of the suspects were released. The public is privy to only sketchy information, so the matter remains a speculation.

*Yesterday President Bush said, "We won't cut and run." What is it with these Yale alumni?
Search and destroy, shock and awe, etc.

*The aware folks who watch those streaks in the sky called chemtrails, as opposed to contrails, noticed daily activity in June and July, but August has been completely devoid of chemtrails from day one. Is that not strange? (Contrails are normal and disperse after a minute or two. Chentrails are fatter and spread out, sometimes staying all day and creating a cloudy haze.)

*The Taliban is gaining control again in rural regions of Afghanistan. Bad as they appear to be, it's noteworthy that they did offer to deliver Osama bin Laden to us if we would reveal to them the evidence that bin Laden ordered the 9-11 attacks. Secretary of State Colin Powell said: "OK, we'll produce the evidence tomorrow morning." Morning came and Powell refused to discuss it. Even then, the Taliban council voted on whether to turn bin Laden over to us. The measure failed by one vote.

*Scientists keep themselves in business by finding new planets. They did it again. I heard they recently found two out there near Pluto, or in that neighborhood. They also tell us the universe is expanding. Oh, is that so? Call me sometime and we'll talk about it.

*For two weeks the leader of the most powerful and influential nation in the history of the world stood by while a powerful, militarized country invaded its very weak neighbor. He refused to support ceasefire efforts as cities, powerplants, roads, and apartment buildings were bombed (with weapons Made In America) and thousands of refugees fled to the countryside. Is anybody proud?
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OVERHEARD: "Talk about depressing. I asked my doctor for some Prozac and he wouldn't give me any. Now that's depressing."

TWENTY-YEARS-FROM-NOW NEWS: President Jeb Bush says he has no plans to fire Defense Secretary Donald Rumsfeld and will not cut and run from our commitment to establish democracy in Cuba. "If we don't fight them in Cuba, we'll have to fight them in Florida," Bush said.

QUOTE: "The only way to make democracy work is to shoot the 50 worst congressmen every year." - H.L. Mencken

DEMOCRACY IN IRAQ

Democracy in the new Iraq might be as phony as The People's Democratic Republic of North Korea. Lofty sounding, but in name only.

The new constitution of Iraq doesn't guarantee freedom of worship. In fact, it prescribes Islam. There will be no freedom of the press, no right to assemble, no jury trial, and no right to own weapons to protect your home.

Also, women will lose most of the rights which were granted to them by Saddam.

When American occupying forces finally leave Iraq, the likelihood of a military coup will be at least as great as when Saddam and the Baath Party took over the Republic of Iraq. The law of the land of Iraq as now written will not adequately safeguard the rights of the citizens.

HOW'S THAT AGAIN, MR. PRESIDENT?

President Bush announced that the Hezbollah had been defeated in the just-ended war in Lebanon. That was yesterday, but today an official in the Lebanese government - Defense Minister Elias Murr - said, "We won't disarm the Hezbollah. That's something Israel wasn't able to do itself."

Hezbollah is celebrating, people in the streets of Beirut are demonstrating for them, and their huge arsenel of mortars, missiles and guns is mostly intact. They look satisfied, proud and cocky.
Could it be possible that President Bush is receiving flawed information?

LONDON AIRLINER PLOT

We should know today whether the plot is real or a charade to add focus to the "war on terrorism." The prosecutors must present evidence against the 24 Muslim Englishmen being held on charges of planning to blow up 10 airliners. Innocent until proven guilty is a precious rule, but the suspects have to be super innocent to let them go from such serious charges.

News at eleven.

SOFT NEWS

*Advertising in textbooks could mean free books for students. Maybe a revolution has begun in the $6 billion per year college textbook industry. A St. Paul, Minnesota company, Freeload Press, sells ads to FedEx Kinko and other national firms in the more than 100 titles it prints. People who think we already have too much commercialism are fussing and fuming. Get used to it. The next step is chalkboard advertising.

*The U.S. Census Bureau reports that Utah ranks number one in birth rate and last in out-of-wedlock births. Think about it.

*We hear that a major airline is about to grant immediate boarding privileges to naked fliers. No more security searching and snooping in long lines for free spirited passengers who have it all together. Takeoff Before Takeoff will be test marketed at McCarran Airport in Las Vegas. An unnamed company spokesperson expressed hope that the plan will catch on so that airport security checks will be unnecessary.

*Overheard in a coffee house: If I stay proactive, the best-case scenario will be a win-win for me, with almost no downside while building a viable relationship.

*20-Years-From-Now News: Al Gore, Ralph Nader, Ross Perot, and Hillary Clinton will be guest speakers at the annual gathering of DIDN'T WE ALMOST MAKE IT? convention in Washington, DC.

*Quote: "Democracy passes into despotism." - Plato

CALL IT THE HATCH AMENDMENT

Senator Orrin Hatch, R, Utah almost succeeded with his flag protection amendment. He did garner impressive support for the failed measure. This demonstrates his ability to do the job. Meanwhile, the flags keep burning.

How about another try with an amendment, senator? This one would have many benefits for our nation and its people, and it would honor the Constitution. Hatch should draw up a proposed amendment to the Constitution to allow the citizens to vote on sending their young sons and daughters off to war in far-off lands. That's right, a referendum on war. James Madison should have thought of that one.

The U.S. Constitution allows for only Congress to declare war, but the law hasn't been followed for half a century. The new Hatch amendment would have marvellous results in winning respect in the world. Our system of government would sparkle even more that it does now. Also, it might keep Congressmen honest on the subject of war.

We need The Hatch Amendment passed before the next trillion-dollar, multi-casualty war is presented to the public.

In other words: FAST.

HOMES CRASHING

The National Association of Realtors reports that home prices are falling fast. The average is about seven percent on an annual basis. The steepest drops are in the states - Arizona, California and Florida - where the huge increases heated up the real estate market.

This is significant news because housing construction has been the engine of the economy in recent years. Housing is one category not subject to outsourcing or moving off shore, although the labor is largely done by aliens.

If this market fizzles much more, the public will wake up and demand a protective tariff program to encourage factories in America (remember those?) They'll vote for representatives who will drastically reduce federal spending so as to make the dollar respectable abroad and ease the burden on taxpayers.

The middle class would be born again.

MRS. CASTRO CAN RULE CUBA

Excuse me, Mrs. Castro, but why don't you tell Raul and that happy guy from Venezuela, Hugo Chavez, to get out of your husband's hospital room? You're married to the dude, they're not!

Now, while you've got him down, get Fidel to sign the papers making you the queen. He can establish a monarchy anytime he wants to. Like right now. Then if - pray against it - King Fidel goes to the other side, you are the Queen of Cuba.

You know you can run the place better than Raul. For one thing, you're sober and he isn't. As queen, you can show Cuba's soft side. You can invite Elian Gonzales over for ice cream because you like him, not just for propaganda. You helped Fidel solve many problems. Wives do that.

Such a deal. The people who hated Fidel (we hear there were some) would automatically love you, Queen whats-your-name. You could continue the revolution with the vaunted security- instead-of-liberty programs, superior education, sports excellence and prominence in medicine.

You could work all day and sleep all night. Poor Fidel worked hard every day, but then he had to keep an eye open for the next CIA assassin. He stayed awake, that's why they missed him so often. No one would shoot at the Queen of Cuba.

And if Fidel and you live to be 100, you would prefer living as King and Queen than as Cuba's dictator and Eva Braun. Think royally. Go for the crown!

TRUE TRUCE IN LEBANON ?

The shooting stopped, Israeli soldiers are going home and the United Nations is preparing to send in 15,000 international troops to act as peacekeepers in a buffer zone along Lebanon's southern border. Both Israel and the Hezbollah claim victory in this month-long invasion and war.

President Bush says, "The Hezbollah were defeated." (Mission accomplished?) Then he reiterated Secretary of State Rice's expression about "a new face in the Middle East." Whatever they have in mind is certain to be pro-Israel, anti-Muslim and kind of oily.

We hear from a familiar voice of investigative journalist fame, Seymour Hersh, the man who made Abu Ghraib infamous. Hersh believes the Israeli attack on Lebanon was planned in Washington in 2005. He claims that sources inside both the Bush administration and Tel Aviv tell him U.S. experts on the air war on Kosovo were assisting the Israelis with bombing plans for Beirut and other points in Lebanon.

Their plans might not have been carried out to completion because the Israeli forces met fierce resistance. They failed to reach their goals, as indicated by the sacking and replacing of the military commander and by heavy criticism from within Prime Minister Olmert's Israeli government. The performance of Israeli forces did not impress anyone.

Washington and Tel Aviv might have to use Plan B to topple Iran's rulers, snuff out the nuclear program and set up another Shah.

No, Bush doesn't have a Plan B, but he'll have to find one.

LET YOUR NEIGHBOR BE UGLY

Many of the principles of anarchism were precious tenets of the founders of America. The philosophy of protecting and preserving the sacred rights of the individual prevailed for many generations in this nation before breaking down under the pressures of materialism and political influences such as socialism, communism, fascism, and even capitalism.

Government is government whether it's national, state or municipal. Freedom lovers give too much attention to the oppressive acts of the pompous royalty in Washington, DC. The local level of government intervention against individuals is often more abusive than the totalitarianism seen at state and federal levels.

The late Speaker of the House, Tip O'Neill, said: "All politics is local." There is valuable truth in those words. Secure your freedoms at home first.

In every locality, you'll find breakdowns of the principles of privacy, responsibility and individual rights. Group responsibilty is in fashion. As Hitler, Castro, Stalin, Mussolini and the boys told us: The individual belongs to the state. Modern liberal and conservative Americans seem to agree.

More and more municipalities have laws and ordinances prohibiting citizens from repairing or tinkering with machinery in their own backyards or garages. The original, stated purpose of government is ignored. Our historical heroes, Thomas Jefferson and Patrick Henry, claimed governments were to protect our liberties - not to save our eyes from unsightly sights.

If the guy next door parks old French cars on the front lawn - his front lawn - it is none of government's business. Offended neighbors well might approach the owner and protest. If the Citroens remain on his lawn, the best alternative would be to fall back and take joy that we live in a nation, state or community which butts out of the affairs of taste. Such a philosophy no longer thrives in the sweet land of liberty. Many folks would move away from a neighborhood with bad taste, and they are free to go.

But wouldn't you prefer the company of a dude who exercises freedom on his own property to someone who is offended by it? We don't have Beauty and Perfect Order Police quite yet. Try to think: "in the eye of the beholder" and "ain't nobody's business but my own."

Didn't Ford, Bell and Edison invent their gadgets, devices and machines at home? How miserable their miserable neighbors must have been. Should we pity the thousands of Americans who have had the luck to reside next door to Amway distributors working out of their garages?

Liberty is first. It includes the right to use your property your way. You may watch over your own property, but not that of others. Liberty is beautiful, in its own way.

ITINERARY: PARIS

President Bush keeps repeating something which contradicts historical fact. He says; "Saddam wouldn't let UN weapons inspectors in to search Iraq." Fact is: scores of inspectors were allowed in there for years and made more than 700 inspections of possible weapons sites.

The inspectors were all over Iraq. They destroyed all the hot stuff they found, which were mostly old inventories of gas bombs from the Iraq-Iran War. Some of the goods were "Made in America" and delivered as a result of an agreement between Saddam and one Donald Rumsfeld (who went on to bigger things.)

A prominent weekend survey revealed that most Americans and all the big radio talk hosts still believe the WMD tale. Who could ever doubt them? This means we must stay in Iraq until we find the dreaded devices, the mission wouldn't be accomplished if we left empty-handed. Now Sean and Rush are telling us the weapons of mass destruction were spirited out of Iraq and into Syria or maybe to Iran. If that's the case, the CIA must have blinked because Secretary of Defense Rumsfeld knew right where they were, as did Secretary of State Powell and Vice President Cheney. Perhaps Saddam employed a sleight-of-hand magician who was able to fool our satellite surveillance.

Now the Sean/Rush combo warns that Hezbollah warriors in Lebanon might get their hands on the weapons. Great horrors! And we want to bring the troops home? All WMD believers: stay the course. Now is not the time to go wobbly.

Renew and intensify the search in Iraq, invade and scour Iran, Syria, and Lebanon. If we still don't find the stuff, well, we'd better think about looking in France. Yes, that's probably where the stash is. The French are hiding the WMD in Paris.

Let's roll.

CUBANS AT SEA, GOING BOTH DIRECTIONS

What's the scoop on our man in Havana? "The king is dead," some say. Speculation inside Cuba is that Fidel Castro is totally out of it, already deceased, or playing some kind of a trick. The mystery is because the news before and after Fidelissimo's surgery came from government spokespeople, not the big guy himself.

The government in Havana announced a few days ago that Fidel handed the keys over to his brother, Raul, who will be the new warden. Turmoil prevails on the island. Fidel has been everything - the only thing - to 11 million Cubans for half a century. The world's best neighborhood watch program is now active day and night, especially in districts where dissent is strongest. The Cuban exiles in Miami are stirring and celebrating the possible change in circumstances. Many of them would head back home if Cuban officials became receptive to them.

Meanwhile, the U.S. Congress is planning to throw about $80 million to anti-Castro groups in Cuba who would erase the revolution in favor of American style freedom. One can't forget that this has been done many times before - in Iran, Chile, El Salvador, Iraq, Nicaragua, Viet Nam, etc. - with mixed results. After funding the CIA's many attempts to murder the Cuban leader, Congress is now anxious to take advantage of his apparent demise.

On the day of the news about Fidel, President Bush said, "We want Cubans to gain their freedom." Oh oh! Another Bay of Pigs! Will the Cubans throw flowers at our liberators? How soon will this mission be accomplished?

There seems to be little doubt that Fidel is passing from the scene. If Raul is weak or warms up to his northern neighbors (us), you'll see a crowded sea between Florida and Cuba. Visualize convoys of filled-to-capacity boats fleeing Cuba's security with its free schooling, free health care and subsidized housing for the land of opportunity with untold opportunities and pitfalls. They'll trade security for liberty.

On the sea, they will pass exiled countrymen going back to their pre-Castro home. What irony, nostalgia and excitement. Aged folks will visit the homes they left when the revolution got too hot. Fidel and Che and Raul chased the Batista loyalists and punished them. More than 500 were executed at speedy, no appeal trials held in a baseball park. Those charged with crimes against the people were judged at home plate and shot in centerfield the same day. At least a half million opponents of Fidel fled to Florida, where they set up shop to harrangue the Communist regime by radio broadcasts and clandestine projects inside Cuba.

Watch for a spectacle of flotillas, headed north and south. You shall see Cubans escaping while exiled Cubans rush to the island nation. Both have freedom on their minds, and deserve to find what they are seeking. Neither has had it easy.

IT'S ALL SO SIMPLE

Deep thinking isn't always necessary. Sometimes you can know only one thing about an institution, organization or person and it tells the story. Examples, all you need to know about:

Wal-Mart = Purchases secret life insurance policies on select employees as an additional source of revenue for the company, the beneficiary. Spouses and other relatives are never told of the insurance.

Warren Buffett = Gives away most of his $42 billion fortune.

Banks = Don't have public restrooms.

Illegal immigrants = Work for cheap, but send big bucks back home to relatives.

Congresspersons = Vote themselves pay raises.

Presidents from Harry S. Truman on = Start wars without asking for a declaration of war, the constitutional way.

Target stores = Give generous contributions to charity from profits on retail sales.

Cuba government = Shoots Cubans fleeing the island nation.

The Federal Income Tax = Is voluntary, as explicitly stated, but you must volunteer.

Iraq's new government = Will be an Islamist state, as provided by their new constitution.

Waiters and waitress = Balance and carry more trays, dishes and glasses at one time than is humanly possible.

Federal Reserve System = Has never been audited in its 97 year history.

Israel = Bulldozes homes of relatives of accused terrorists, more than 4,000 demolished so far.

Notre Dame University and Brigham Young University athletic programs = Have never had a cheat-to-win scandal.

Central Intelligence Agency = Attempted multiple assassinations on leaders of sovereign nations over a period of 50 years. A few were carried out.

The Middle Class = Is an unprotected, endangered species.

Life = Goes on.